Thank god for sending me a god "brother" that really care about me..is just like sending me a jacket and hot choc in winter...Chong hurt me too much, he din even wanna bother our relationship...he din even bother my feeling, I seriously dunno what he want from me and what he expect me to do for him..but anyway, my heart already like totally broken and cant feel anything rite that minute...all I can do is let him decide everything, and I will try my best to let go everything soon..I really cant believe he did that to me again and again and again...is that means he love me still..
God sent me a very good god brother so that I able to continue my path alone without chong..Just wanna let chong know, I really cant stand for it dy...if someone ask me who I love most, for sure is always YOU..but may be you already forget the love for me..I really hurt....hurt a lot...luckily, god sent someone here to take over your place to take care of me..really make me feel so touch, he is always there for me when I need him...he is just like my angel...love this brother so much...will do everything for him..thank god...
Today, 24 april 2011....I love today ...just love today...thank chong that hurt me so damn much on today...thank lot to my dear brother that gave so much love for me on today also...god wanna show the difference to me on today...God just arranged all this thing happen in same day so that I can feel which is more important in their heart...for chong, is definitely not me...but for my bro definitely is me...haha:) Love this feeling lol..
Hope will have a good night ...and sweet dream as well....
Sunday, April 24, 2011
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Greatz.....I knew it....
This is the day he told me all those shit thing....just like bull that simply shit here and there...Do I create problem?? He telling I am the trouble maker, I am the one who should fix all this...He using two chinese word to totally break my heart till cant even gum back, "FAN GAN" ...these word hurt me till like I am vampire who already died...then when I realize that I am still alive, my tears coming out from my eye..he giving me no hapiness, nothing..he make my love life suck, like I am single...that still envy those who dating outside..ok...at last, I am the trouble maker....the main trouble maker...chong li qun, you happy with that...
Last time, you wanna come back to me then you treat me like your only angel, but what now?? you promised you will treat me like princess forever..but what now?? you din even bother what you had promised...can you define the word PROMISE?? But now you make me feel everything in your life more important than me, just everything...then where should I stand?? then now you telling I am the trouble maker..you wanna leave here, then just go...if you want me to change then I change la..you dont want to bother me then just dont..I am ok with it...just need time to overcome this thing in my heart, take time...you dont wan me to be trouble maker then ok...I promised you 10 things...then I will do ok...I wont break promise like you did...I know the definition of promise very clear..I love you...this is the conclusion...I can only have you in my life...but now seems like different..you change...you totally change...I am so sorry to myself...Feel so sorry for my heart...I did not know this happen to make my heart hurt like this..I am so sorry to my heart, I did not know love can be like this..I did not know love can hurt so much...I thought love should be romantic that make everyone happy..I really did not know so much about love...so I will beware of love now...get too much of hurt...just too much...
I am totally stuck now..stuck in nowhere...I need someone to help me...need it so much...I cant stand alone for this long...I am not that strong like you guys thought, I am so sorry to disappointing you guys so...I am actually suck like other normal girl..I really dont know what should I do..I wanna run away from all this shit..can I just put away my family, player, work ..then leave them like this only..if yes then where should I go?? any idea guys? i seriously need help...I am stuckk...I knew this day will come to me..face it or leave it???? dying la....
Last time, you wanna come back to me then you treat me like your only angel, but what now?? you promised you will treat me like princess forever..but what now?? you din even bother what you had promised...can you define the word PROMISE?? But now you make me feel everything in your life more important than me, just everything...then where should I stand?? then now you telling I am the trouble maker..you wanna leave here, then just go...if you want me to change then I change la..you dont want to bother me then just dont..I am ok with it...just need time to overcome this thing in my heart, take time...you dont wan me to be trouble maker then ok...I promised you 10 things...then I will do ok...I wont break promise like you did...I know the definition of promise very clear..I love you...this is the conclusion...I can only have you in my life...but now seems like different..you change...you totally change...I am so sorry to myself...Feel so sorry for my heart...I did not know this happen to make my heart hurt like this..I am so sorry to my heart, I did not know love can be like this..I did not know love can hurt so much...I thought love should be romantic that make everyone happy..I really did not know so much about love...so I will beware of love now...get too much of hurt...just too much...
I am totally stuck now..stuck in nowhere...I need someone to help me...need it so much...I cant stand alone for this long...I am not that strong like you guys thought, I am so sorry to disappointing you guys so...I am actually suck like other normal girl..I really dont know what should I do..I wanna run away from all this shit..can I just put away my family, player, work ..then leave them like this only..if yes then where should I go?? any idea guys? i seriously need help...I am stuckk...I knew this day will come to me..face it or leave it???? dying la....
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Chinese New Year Eve...heading to the brand new rabbit year..
Still have 15 minutes leave before rabbit year...In this Tiger's year, I have totally out of luck in everything, which include health, love, family and lot more..so I really hope in the brand new rabbit will bring me luck in everything...god bless me please, I really had enough of bad luck and need some good luck to cheer me up again...
First bad, my health...dengue, asma, sick and sick again, the "THING" inside my body, then fever and fever again...gosh, really need to get off these thing..make me weak...So, I really hope in the rabbit year, I will as cute as rabbit and as strong as a dragon which I use to be...wahahhaaa...
Second bad, about family...I concern about my grandma so much..so I really keep searching some medicine for her to cure every pain in her body..then last month, I bought some medicine for her leg pain, then make her feel more weak ...I called doctor to ask about that, then doctor told me that will happen to her because of her weak body, then the medicine cant match with blood which contains sugar so this is what happen to my grandma...huhhhh...freaking sad and down...dunno how to face my grandma now..she keep telling that is because of my medicine to make her so weak now ..gosh...presssure lol...
Third bad, all about love...I cant believe he treat me like this...every single thing important than me in his life...so how do I going to take him as my husbadn to protect me forever...so have lot deal with him..but...I sure end up with forgiving him again and again because my love to him is too too too deep...I dunno how much I love him..I dunno how deep I love him..I worry bout him too too much that words cant describe..but why he still keep hurt-ing me like this...so I really hope I will have a brand new rabbit love in rabbit year...rabbit please bless me..hahaha..thank...
And now is the time....Happy Chinese Rabbit Year to the world...!!!!! I hope rabbit year of 2011 will bring luck, hapiness, love , health and proeperity to my family and friends....I love all of them so much...love both my grandma and grandpa..mmuackhh...love my lovely dad and mum, mmuackhh...love all three of my bro, mmuakhh...love all of my uncle, aunt and cousin..mmuackkhhh...and for sure love all my friends..,mmmuackhh....
For sure, not forgotten my love one, chong...I love you so much..that words cant describe..although we have trouble in our relationship..but no matter how or what happen or we cant get together..I will still love you...best of luck world..!! haha...gonna help my mum to prepare those red packets...Good night world..!!
First bad, my health...dengue, asma, sick and sick again, the "THING" inside my body, then fever and fever again...gosh, really need to get off these thing..make me weak...So, I really hope in the rabbit year, I will as cute as rabbit and as strong as a dragon which I use to be...wahahhaaa...
Second bad, about family...I concern about my grandma so much..so I really keep searching some medicine for her to cure every pain in her body..then last month, I bought some medicine for her leg pain, then make her feel more weak ...I called doctor to ask about that, then doctor told me that will happen to her because of her weak body, then the medicine cant match with blood which contains sugar so this is what happen to my grandma...huhhhh...freaking sad and down...dunno how to face my grandma now..she keep telling that is because of my medicine to make her so weak now ..gosh...presssure lol...
Third bad, all about love...I cant believe he treat me like this...every single thing important than me in his life...so how do I going to take him as my husbadn to protect me forever...so have lot deal with him..but...I sure end up with forgiving him again and again because my love to him is too too too deep...I dunno how much I love him..I dunno how deep I love him..I worry bout him too too much that words cant describe..but why he still keep hurt-ing me like this...so I really hope I will have a brand new rabbit love in rabbit year...rabbit please bless me..hahaha..thank...
And now is the time....Happy Chinese Rabbit Year to the world...!!!!! I hope rabbit year of 2011 will bring luck, hapiness, love , health and proeperity to my family and friends....I love all of them so much...love both my grandma and grandpa..mmuackhh...love my lovely dad and mum, mmuackhh...love all three of my bro, mmuakhh...love all of my uncle, aunt and cousin..mmuackkhhh...and for sure love all my friends..,mmmuackhh....
For sure, not forgotten my love one, chong...I love you so much..that words cant describe..although we have trouble in our relationship..but no matter how or what happen or we cant get together..I will still love you...best of luck world..!! haha...gonna help my mum to prepare those red packets...Good night world..!!
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